Would You Spy On A Spouse And Check Text Messages?
This can be a gray area because people have such differing opinions about this matter, some believing it is quite okay and others not.
Are you in the right or wrong? I’m going to leave that one up to you. In the heat of the moment and if you feel something is up, you won’t be debating is it right or wrong.
Reading Cheating Husbands Text Messages
What about if you suspect that something is going on? You have that sixth sense and suspect or know that you husband or partner might be cheating.
If you suspect a partner of cheating and you feel that the trust has been lost, you may well feel validated to read those text messages.
It’s going to nag away at you, knowing that there might be incriminating evidence within hand’s reach.
Is it tempting? I would say, yes definitely it sure is.
It all centers around trust. When trust has been lost you feel fragile emotionally and finding evidence of guilt will validate any moral issues that may have been competing with the need to know issues in your head.
Is Your Marriage/Relationship Transparent?
If your partner has unlimited access to all forms of communication, that is emails, texts, bank statements etc, neither of you will have any need to spy because the relationship is one where everything is out in the open. However, consider this, he deletes all text messages as soon as they have been sent.
Does this send any red flags up for you? It should or is this something you push to the back of your mind?
Technology has made this easier. There’s the phone just lying there. Checking text messages will take just a second.
You have decided to go ahead and check but consider this – What are you going to do if you do find something there that you don’t like?
One woman just deleted all messages and contacts from her partner’s phone plus she sent texts to the women (yes, there were three) saying that the relationship had ended. I guess she still had to deal with the fall out but there is definitely going to be some anger and strong emotion when first confronted with the truth. Even if you suspected something was going on, it is still a huge blow to actually be confronted with the truth. Now there is nowhere to go and it has to be dealt with.
But Nothing Happened…
Cheating comes in different forms and although we usually think of traditional cheating in terms of being unfaithful or having an affair there is also emotional cheating. Nothing physical may have happened but there are still text messages that are definitely not fitting in with being “just a friend” and it is still cheating.
If you are already hot under the collar or upset you need to determine how you’ll react if you find something that is suspicious. Making threats like ‘I will kill him’ may vent your frustration but you still need to deal with the issue of what you are going to do.
Will You Confront Him?
Most people would confront a partner. If you want more details about how to catch a cheater – click here.
Do yourself a favor and let some time pass before the confrontation. Let the initial shock pass. It’s difficult to be rational in these situations but even harder when there’s shock coupled with anger and disappointment.
Still Have Doubts?
Will you just keep checking and see what develops?
Will you check no more and decide you don’t want to know?
Will you think it has been a mistake?
Some of those choices come under the banner of denial but ultimately the action you take is up to you. You are less like to respond in an emotional state if you have already thought of how you are going to handle an unpleasant situation.
Why do men cheat in the first place? What is your opinion about this?