Have You Made These Dating Mistakes Even Smart Women Make?
Reading about dating mistakes that even smart women make, makes us feel a bit more normal knowing that everyone makes dating mistakes, smart or not.
There are some pretty basic mistakes which are sure to scare off a date.
Sometimes we don’t (even smart women 🙂 ) realise that we are even doing those things. Look at the following common dating mistakes women make and honestly assess whether you think you might be guilty.
This might sound like something you would say to a five year old but it something that seems to follow many of us into adulthood. When someone is speaking, there is that powerful urge to interrupt. It might be to interject the sudden brainwave that you must just share or your similar experience that you feel compelled to outline in detail. Show the other person that you are 100% interested in what they are saying, give them your undivided attention and talk when it is your turn.
If all he does is talk about himself and shows no interest in anything about you, well you have the choice not to see him again.
He Likes To Be A Hero
Guys love to be heroes even though they might not admit it. Show your appreciation if he opens doors, pulls out you chair. Always acknowledge those gestures. It is important to do so and it is polite.
When meeting a person there is always a polite exchange of information to find out the interests and information about the other person. You pretty quickly can establish through general conversation if you hold the same values.
At this stage, don’t give your life story. It is boring for the other person when you are basically still a stranger. Take your cues from the other person.
Practice active listening. Listen to what the other person is saying and interject when it is appropriate to do so by asking questions which elaborate on what he was talking about.
On the other hand, you don’t want to give so little information that your date knows nothing about you.
Go down the middle path and have balanced conversation.
Plus you need to have more to offer on subsequent dates.
By now you might be thinking, uh oh, I am making some of these mistakes. Have you considered using an online dating consultant.
There are more dating mistakes that even smart women make. In fact the list is probably endless. Are you guilty of putting yourself down? Putting yourself down is energy draining.That’s the last thing you want on a date.
Don’t Put Yourself Down
Are you in the habit of putting yourself down?
Maybe you say or think things like:
“No guy is going to be interested in me”.
“I’m too old to get a guy”.
“I’m too out of shape” and so on
Putting yourself down can be quite demoralizing for the person you are with. You don’t want a date thinking he is going to have to ‘prop you up’. That is a surefire way to send a man packing. However you think of yourself will be evident in the way you act. If you think you might fall into this category, practise thinking of yourself in a positive light.
Make a list of the attributes you like (yes you can do that). Give yourself some credit and your confidence and general demeanour will soar. Remember everyone has niggling insecurities, no one is perfect but don’t dwell on the negative, focus on the positive.
The last thing you want to sound like is someone who whines and complains about every little thing. That is such a turn off. There is a time and place for complaints and sometimes we need to but on a date, especially an early date, definitely no. Voicing an opinion is quite different to complaining.
Red flags will be raised as your date thinks
That wasn’t worth worrying about
Is she going to complain about my habits and actions?
It’s miserable and negative when people complain all the time. He might be thinking – I don’t like the way in which she complained about our meal to the waiter. I wonder if she is always like that? Too many red flags and bye bye. You won’t see him again.
Did You Interview The Poor Man?
Don’t make it a game of 20 questions. Of course you want to find out new and exciting things about your date but you don’t want him to feel that he is applying for a position in your life and that he has to pass a test first.
He may see this as being “too picky” before he has even had a chance to get to know you plus it’s not a good way for the conversation to flow. Leave your mental checklist at home.
Did You Tell Him How Busy You Are?
It’s one thing to have a full life but another to have such a busy life that you have no time for a man and this is how he might interpret your busyness. He might just think – I don’t think she is going to have much time to spend with me because she is already so busy. This could put him off asking you out a second time.
Fun And Interesting?
Did you show good energy levels and an interest in the date. If you are low in energy and look as though you really can’t be bothered, it’s not going to go well.
Think about your energy levels when you go to meet your date. If you are dull and lacking in energy it will show. He will think it’s not worth the effort and that will be that. Show some enthusiasm and interest in your date.
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